What can I do with a mother that keeps asking me for money?

If you don't want to read all of this, just don't. Don't post "this is too long to read" because I don't care. Thanks.





Okay, so at first it didn't bother me when I was younger, like 13/14 but graduation is a week away and I've been getting money from people. I know that I shouldn't be stingy and she's my mom, but I don't have a job, nor do I get any outside money. I'm broke most of the time, once in a while my dad might send some money for me, but I always have to give it to her either because she asks for it or because she gives me the guilt trip about how she doesn't have any money or how she can't pay the bills, etc. So like I said, it usually doesn't bother me, but this is why it started bothering me:





First, her mortgage was I think $1400 a month which she couldn't pay because she made less than that, but she got it down to about $600 a month.


Next, her car payments were about $350 I think and she got it down to $200.


She quit a job for TWO jobs that paid more than what she was working for AND she works more hours at her new job.


Then she got her taxes, and got about $4,000 back, she said she was going to save $1,000 so she could pay for my deposits for college, but some how in two months she spent ALL of it to the point where she almost had to borrow money to pay my deposits ($600).


We went to New York over my spring break so I could visit some colleges and my dad sent $200 for the trip, and all I was able to buy for myself was two berets ($5 each) and my belly button piercing ($25). Almost everything else some how wormed it's way out of the money my dad sent.





So fast-forward to now. I practically had to beg my dad for money because my mom was frustrated because she couldn't pay my school deposits, which she did, so I was like well, okay, that was $600 so I gave her the $200, then I was suppose to get my hair done for my cap and gown pictures and she didn't have the money for that or the pictures. I opened up a bank account because this lady gave me $100, and their was a promotion from the bank where they would give me $100 if I put in $100. This other lady gave me $75. This is my GRADUATION money by-the-way, and I had to give it to my mom. That's over $500!





Okay, so like I said I wouldn't mind but there's things I need to buy. I haven't gone clothes/shoes shopping in nearly 3 years because she never has any money. Any time she gets a lump sum of money like from taxes she blows through it in a month or two and never saves any of it.





I'm so sick of it! And I'm suppose to be getting a job over the summer and I fear that I will have NO money for myself because she's going to ask for it. Am I being a bad kid for letting this bother me?





I don't know what do. HELP!!!|||Uh, GET A JOB???????|||It's hard to say no to your parents but some times it has to be done I don't care what anyone says about it unless they've been there and they would say the same thing. I got a job when I was 13 my mom had a lot of kids and needed help she kept all my money and gave me $20.00 I had a kid at 17 and she still asked for money and I gave it to her I got a better job and had another kid and would pay her $200.00 per weekend to watch my kids on the weekends then another kid and a divorce I was raising my 3 kids my little sister and my mother I could not do it anymore so I put a stop to it at the age of 27 and she would ask and I would tell her she had to do it her self it's not fare to me to take care of all of that my self she got on disability and got a apartment where she could afford it, it you let some one walk all over they will family or not even if they don't realize it put your money in the bank and don't tell her how much you have if she asked say (sorry I don't have any left I had to pay for this or that) You will feel bad at first but it will help you in the long run.|||It's not your fault that your mom is a poor manager of her money (and apparently yours too)


No you aren't selfish, and you let it bother you, not because you deserve to feel bad, but because you really are a good kid.


You are letting your instinct to trust your mom, and follow her wishes get in your way.


If everything you say here is true then I think that holding out on your mom and keeping some of your money for yourself is a little more prudent than selfish.





I think your mom has a problem concerning money. I don't have enough information to properly guess exactly what it might be, but this problem is her problem and her responsibility.


It shouldn't have to be your duty to bail her out every time she finds herself coming up short.